A Day Without XBox...

I want to spend some time with you, crafting. I want some time to focus on you and our friendship and aging and what we're doing with ourselves as we get older. I want to make things with our hands and laugh and drink tea and feel relaxed.

Things are calming down here, if only from a loud roar to a dull one. John is working hard on his mental state and my expectations of him, and I am working hard on my patience and understanding of his disease.

I started out with so much to tell you, but the short of it is that we just had Thanksgiving and I gave thanks for you, my kitten.

Now, I just want to share those thanks with you while we giggle about something inane.

O' Kitten My Kitten

Kat,

My life is full of bullshit right now. The long and the short of it is that Andrew did something really really shitty, and I got really really mad, and then later that night he yelled at John for no reason, and when he apologized, it wasn't an apology as much as it was an insult. John and I responded with anger, which is really all I've had for the situation for over a week now, and Andrew responded by publicly slandering me in a way that let all my friends see it but not me. Now, what I am left with, is being 29 and feeling just like I did in High School, that the people who surround me aren't good for my peace or sanity or heart. I need more support right now. I need more kindness. I need a gentleness of spirit and soft words and someone who loves my little family of John and I and our pets and I can't find it here.

Times like this are really lonely, especially when I think of you and Jesse and the life you're building, and of Seattle and how I miss it. John hates Seattle, doesn't want to live there even for a while, and I don't know how to tell him that I need to figure out a way to get out of here. I love Bellingham, I love my little town tucked away by the ocean, hidden by mountains, secret and calm and smelling of salt and fog and trees. I love the people downtown and I love that I feel "home" here, but I am so tired of being constantly "ON" here. I need to be "off" for a while, in small letters, small sounds.

I feel helpless and strung too tightly lately. With school and my marriage and our crazy ass roommate situation and now with work exploding like it is always bound to do because that's what this shop does, I feel like no matter which step I take it will be the wrong one.

I worry about you, too, Kitten. I worry that you don't tell me things because you don't want to unload on my already heavy heart. I worry about us, about how we're going to be as mothers, as wives, as friends as we get more and more claiming our attention.

What I do not worry about is how much I love you and how much you love me. I do not know how to explain to you that your love is my one constant, my one rock, the one unshakable thing I have to cling to when all else is dark and I ache because I feel battered and exhausted.

I miss you so much.

And I'll burn this whole city down....

Kat,

I feel really removed from you lately, and I think it's mostly my fault. School is so all consuming. It's been a very very long time since I wanted this badly to do well at something, and all my energy has been on that and my marriage. With John's friend still living in my craft room (he'll be out by month's end...) and no time, I can't get in there to make anything with my hands, which makes me really antsy.

I miss your soft way of speaking and your full throated laugh, and I hope to see you soon.

The weekend before your birthday? What say you? Are you busy? Can I see you then?

Much Love,

Opie

it will all be ok

Steph,

It will all be ok. Maybe not the way we'd want it to be, but I do believe that eventually everything will be ok.

I was thinking of visiting you in Bellingham this weekend. Would that be a good idea?

big love,

k a t

And my name no one shall know...

Kat,

I held a 5 week old baby a few days ago. One of my customers, Annie, had a beautiful baby girl that she named "Ayla" when I was in New York. I have seen Ayla asleep many times since my return, but the other day for the first time, she was awake and fussy and moving around. Annie handed her off to me in a slow moment. I took her tiny little body and cradled it on my shoulder. Ayla instantly nuzzled into my neck, put one tiny hand on my mouth, and commenced to sleeping again, almost curving into the contour of my collar bone.

I rocked back and forth on my feet, made small cooing sounds, and apparently I started crying. Before I was aware it was happening, small tears were rolling down my cheeks onto Ayla's tiny little head. Katy saw it and covered up for me well, making some joke and shaking her head ever so slightly, letting me know she knew, and she knew why the tears had come, and she knew that I needed a moment.

I am not in a place to have kids. My marriage is falling apart, although we're trying so hard to glue it back together. I feel like my mind is falling apart most days, I'm so much more scattered. I start writing and close the window before I am finished, like committing my thoughts to any kind of page, digital or otherwise, cements me into a position where I cannot escape and cannot improve.

I'm having such a hard time crafting. Right now, the only craft I can stand to put my mind to is the knitting I am doing as a learning project. I walked into my sewing room the other day, half heartedly looked at some bundles, and walked right back out. I can't handle being in there, it feels overwhelming and stifling. My creativity and drive seems to have leaked out of me when all this heartache came rushing in, like there is only so much space and the hurty bits displaced all the ideas and the need to make something with my hands.

I feel lost, my kitten, and on top of it all, my ovaries are hurting every time I see tiny little hands or hear a child laugh.

Tell me it will all be okay.

Please?

--opie

schmacation

Oh, Opie,

Why is coming back from vacation so hard? Is it coming back to work? Is it unpacking? Is it half-assedly planning a reception for more people than actually were able to attend your wedding? While it looks like it's going to rain on your picnic?

Is it the fact that I should be looking for another job?

I don't know, but coming back has been a little difficult. I love my home and my life here, but I miss Woodstock and having all my friends around me.

I know things haven't been entirely smooth sailing for you either. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you on the roommate situation. But this is how I think of you:



dancing without a thought to trouble with me nearby. Let it be so again and right soon.

squidges (that's british for hugs),

k a t

Kat,

Well, I'm back to the grind here in Washington, and wishing I were back in Woodstock, swimming in the stream.

I can't thank you enough for the wonderful time in New York. I had so much fun.

You looked so beautiful and serene, peaceful and happy and glowing on your wedding day, and I was so proud to be a part of it, proud to kiss you goodbye in that cabin and know what a huge thing you were doing. Jesse looked so happy, seeing you walk towards him, and all our friends were so full of love for the both of you.

New York city was glamorous and wonderful, and I'd love to go back. the more I travel, the more I want to travel.

Next up, NEW ZEALAND!

I met some wonderful Kiwis today, they bought coffee and talked with me and Jonathan for a while about the way coffee is expanding in their country. I can't wait till we start things in motion for that trip.

I adore you, O Kitten, and hope you find your transition into married life smooth and blissful.

Know that I am thinking of you and loving you both.

Love,
Opie

fight till we're free

Hey there,

I promise I'm still here. Well you know that, because I did get to see you recently, albeit for much too short of a visit. I just don't feel quite all here. I keep wondering if I have "bride brain", I imagine it to be like "baby brain" but obviously without the baby. I feel flighty and confused. It's not like bridezilla, I'm not even focused enough to boss people around.

It's a good thing I know how relaxing Woodstock is. Even with a wedding going on I can't imagine being stressed out while I'm there. As the days stretch out long there, full of pie baking and swimming holes.

Meanwhile there is so much to do here still. Little things, but lots of little things. I'm going to bring some craft stuff to make party favors with. I don't know why that matters to me, but all of a sudden it does. I want to make flowers from the rick rack and buttons my grandma left me. I want her to somehow be a part of all this.

I know I haven't asked much of you yet, but believe me, I get a lot of comfort just from knowing that you are there. That you are willing to help with anything. That you will be there to help me be ready to walk down that aisle, the way I was for you.
All these years we've been friends, looking forward to sharing these huge events together and now they are happening. I am so glad to know you'll be next to me for them.

Love,

k a t

Dear Kat,

I added you on Flickr. I saw that you had called me today, and I didn't have the energy to call you back. We went down to Mom and Dad's, and while there I was having a horrible allergy attack. My mom gave me some Benedryl, and that pretty much knocked me out for the duration of the visit. I COULD NOT wake up. They all tried to wake me several times. I'd swim towards consciousness and drift right back down into coma-like sleep.

I have lots to tell you, but the words are all bunged up right now. After a lovely few days of getting along with no disagreements and perfect harmony, John picked a fight with me about New York and money again tonight when we got home (what else is there for us to fight about these days) and we're both in bed, angry. I am hitting a brick wall in explaining this to him, and I am almost to the point of just giving up and saying "Fuck It" on this subject. It's hard, because it's hurting me, and taking the enjoyment of anticipation away from me.

I will be writing more tomorrow, but for now, I'll leave you with this thought. I got my mother's button tin today when I visited. As long as I can remember, all of my mother's buttons have been in a dusty grayish blue tin with geese on the top. She brought it out when we were talking about how I had gotten rid of my button collection, and told me I was welcome to it. Some of the buttons are junk, some are plain, and some are quite unique, but my favorites are the ones still on cards from the 30's, with prices like $.29 on them for 4 beautiful buttons, and my great grandmother's scribbles on the back. Usually, there is only 1 left on the card, and the spaces where the other buttons sat are discolored from the rest of the piece of cardstock. I can't wait to show them to you.

I have the new Bloc Party CD running through my head. My new favorite song is called "The Prayer" and it is pretty much on constant repeat in my brain later. "Lord give me grace/and dancing feet/and the power to impress...... Tonight make me unstoppable and I will charm I will slice I will dazzle you with my wit // Tonight make me unstoppable and I will charm I will slice I will dazzle I will outshine you all" It makes me feel ever so slightly badass and a bit cocky for what I've had the audacity to start.

I thought about you and about how our lives have changed while driving through Seattle towards home, tonight. I wish I could have stopped and sat and had tea for a bit, but John had to get home to sleep. To be fair, I'm still so drugged with the Benedryl, I may not have been able to keep my eyes open in any case. I just wanted to sit and listen to some Deathcab with you and talk about where we've come from and where we are going, and how we'll be with each other along each one of those steps.

I miss you a great deal, tonight. Hug yourself for me, okay?

Love,
Opie

Million dollar haircut on a 29 cent head....

Dear Kat,

I heard a song with that line in it yesterday, and I can't stop thinking of it. Sometimes I feel like that, dressing up all my stupidity and everything I'm lacking with a fancy haircut and this outward smile. I sure felt like that yesterday. I'll have to call you to tell you about work. It was... challenging.

I understand the odd feeling. I don't know if you remember, but in the month before my wedding, I was feeling the same thing. Events were moving rapidly, and I was feeling, well, not exactly overwhelmed but a bit removed from what was occurring, and I had to do the same thing that you're doing, think small.

As for the vows, they will come to you. I put off writing mine until the day before, because every time I'd think about it, I had something so saccharine or words that fell flat. I ended up just being simple, being straightforward, being honest, and telling him what I told my friends about marrying him.

As your wedding draws closer, I hope there is more I can do to help. To be honest, I feel like I've done nothing, and that others have been of so much assistance. I've been your best friend for over 12 years! Maybe we can sit and talk, the weekend you come to Bellingham, and we'll go over some details and see what I or Carly can do to help you out, okay?

I am very excited for our trip. Every day I think of something else I'm looking forward to about being there. Carly and I leave in 19 days!

To be honest, I'm selfishly glad you're not going to Korea. I feel like there is so much we keep saying "we'll do that later" and then because of our schedules and the tendancy we both have to procrastinate, we put off things we'd like to do or see together. I was worried about you being overseas when big things happen, like when I get pregnant or John and I buy a house. The next big trip I want to take is our Europe trip or to New Zeland to visit Dan and Courtney, and I can't imagine doing either of those without you by my side.

Looking towards the future is good, but as a word of advice, I will say this: Your plan to look at the small things for right now is a solid one. You have a huge trip and a huge life changing event on the horizon. You'll still be here when you are done with it, and the future will still be waiting. Take the time to just enjoy this journey, and when this beginning has settled you will instantly be able to see other paths and opportunities as the fog clears.

Did you know my Oma's name is also Rita? I'm so sorry your Grandma won't be there with you, Kat. There's not much I can say to ease that ache, other than I know what you're feeling. My Great Gramma Lona (the one who lived with us, and the Gramma I was closest to) died a couple of years after High School, and I still miss her every day. I'm sad that neither her or Opa got to meet John, I know they both would have enjoyed him so much.

I need to get running. I have my show tonight at the Wild Buffalo, and I need to finish this last bag and get all the hand sewing gathered together. I work from 11:30 to 7, and then go straight to set up. John is being a gem, putting my display together for me today and cutting up my business cards and making tags for my items. He had me show him last night what I want him to do, and he's taking care of it today so that I could focus on crafting last night. He's also taking Hilary to test drive cars before she goes to work today, so his first day off is pretty much taken up doing things for our little family. He's been really supportive of me basically locking myself in my sewing room for the last week, and he wants to know each step of what I'm doing and how he can help. Sometimes he really stretches my patience, but the majority of the time I can easily see why I fell in love with him and continue to do so every day. He's cooking me bacon when he wakes up. What more can a girl ask for?

Wish me luck tonight, Kat. I'll post and let you know how it went!

Love,
Opie

small things

Dear Opie,

The last few days I've been feeling a little odd. Nothing uncomfortable. Nostalgic I guess. I feel like so many things are ending, when really most are beginning.

My sister is graduating this Saturday and I can't think of what I want to give her. What could honor her achievement and let her know how proud I am?

Our wedding plans are gaining steam and I'm having difficulty writing my vows. How do you let someone know how loved they are? How easy it's been to make this decision and yet how important it is to have made it?

And of course I'm still sad that my Grandma Rita won't be there.

I'm also adjusting to the fact that our probably-leaving for Korea is turning into probably-staying here. I feel fine about the staying. Life feels settled here in a good way. The problem with staying is I can't continue to just work at the store with little thought to the future. I need to think about what my next step is and honestly I just don't know. There isn't a rush to figure it out, but I feel afloat nonetheless.

I'm trying to think small right now, concentrating on the little things that I find comforting. Like this rack of spools, most of which came from my Grandma. Now standing proudly on my bedroom wall. Or this little outfit, with just a tiny hint of dyed slip. (Hint: it's the part keeping my bust decent.)



wishing good things for you, both large and small,

k a t

Crafting intervention Sunday

Dear Kat,

Yesteray ended up a better crafting day, indeed. John made me a delicious omlette, I hate to say it, but even better than yours from the Blue House days of yore. It was chock full of Feta and Kalamatas, and he even went to the store expressly to get bacon for me, as I was a cranky seamstress when he dragged himself out of bed in the morning.

After breakfast, I took a break to sleep in the sun on the deck. It felt glorious. I think I am better suited to some type of desert climate. I felt like a lizard, lounging about in the heat, feeling the light bake into me. I needed that. I drank lots of water with slices of fresh lemon (also picked up at the store in the morning expressly for me) and spritzed myself with a water bottle every so often. It was divine, even though I got a slight burn. Next week I need to look for something approximating a bathing suit for woodstock. I can't wait to go swimming. Jilly and I were going to go out to Toad Lake yesterday to take a dip, but by the time it got down to it, the clouds were gathering and I was really on a roll with my sewing.

Also, I thought you would appreciate this:



I heard a loud grinding noise and the sound of breaking glass while Hilary and John were doing cleanup. A few minutes later, there was wild laughter, and they called me to the top of the stairs. Apparently, John had tried to use the garbage disposal, and there was something jammed in it.... Yup. That's a half slip. I guess one from the last dye lot slipped down into the disposal when I was rinsing them, and I didn't even notice because it was so late at night when I was finished! Hilary held the offending slip in front of her and said "Steph, we need to have a talk. Your crafting is getting out of control. We found this in your garbage disposal. When John turned it on, it jammed and vibrated the sink, breaking wineglasses. Your craft habit is becoming dangerous to others..."

My craft habit also almost proved dangerous to me yesterday as well. I broke two needles in the course of sewing during my afternoon and evening, one of which broke into about 3 pieces, hitting me in the face with tiny sharp pieces of metal. It was too close to my eye for comfort.

So at the end of the day yesterday, injuries and slip ups and all, I had two bags done. The first one is from that purple/pink blazer I had ripped up:





I know this last one makes it look larger than it is. This is the medium size one from the pattern I designed. My machine is just looking smaller because it is pushed back on the table. I named my machine "Belda" because I found a slip of paper in the notions box with all the feet that said "Belda" serviced her in 1964 before she left the factory, and Belda sewed a test strip of stitches that is still in the box.

Then I made this one, and you know how much I love those 70's colors:





This was made from a pair of twill stretch pants I had originally intended be a bag for Carly two Christmastimes ago and never got around to it. The lining is a green linen blazer and the tie is one that Amber found when we thrifted. I loved the color and texture! So Disco! I took measurements of the pattern in the bag book I got, did some math, and transposed the pattern onto a piece of wrapping paper. I could have taken it to a copy place and enlarged it like I was supposed to, but that would have involved showering and going out in public.

Finally, I wanted to show you this:



this is .BMP of the adobe file Courtney sent me. In adobe it looks much better, clean lines and such that are clearly curliqued so they look like stitching, and the outline of the skull and crossbones are also cross stitching. How rad is that? Court brought pizza and garlic bread over yesterday just to take a break and say "Hi", and to discuss a bit of the logo/website stuff. We're meeting either today or tomorrow to get the domain name stuff purchased, etc. I'm really really excited. She is just amazing, and I'm lucky to have her help.

Well, I need to shower and head to work, then home to sew some more. I need to see if I can get wallets done to match the two bags I made, perhaps wallets and one change purse, since they seem to go so fast.

I'll be sending you good thoughts today.

Love,
Opie

in a city by the sea

Dear Opie,

My crafting this weekend consisted mostly of knitting on the neverending dress. Thankfully it was Hilltop knit night so I was able to knit at a pub with my funloving coworkers. They are quite supportive of the dress which is good, as I don't have a vision of how it's going to actually turn out. I really need to figure out what I'm putting under it. A little birdie told me Nordstrom is having a big sale this Wednesday. I'm thinking I need a dress and a bathing suit...

I also spent a lot of time going through the sewing supplies left to me from my Grandma. I now have more ribbon and trim then I ever thought I would. Not to mention sewing thread and bobbins. I find little slips of paper with names of quilts like "drunkards path" and I don't want to throw them away.

I am wearing two slips today, one is completely hidden except for maybe a little bit of white lace poking out and the other is a half slip that we started to dye at your place and I finished off here. Now it's more of that deep terracotta/rusty orange I was going for. I'll try to add a pic (when I'm not at work). Slips are so perfect for coverage on these hot, windless days. I only have one pair of shorts and they're not really work appropriate anyway.

It's going to be a slow day at the shop. It's gorgeous outside and summer sales are on. I'm dreaming of the things I'd be doing if I weren't here. Baking a pie. Finishing off sewing that poppy skirt I started last year. Sorting my grandmas' buttons to make something from the Japanese book I bought at Uwajimaya.



Instead, I'm here, so I think I'll practice my crochet. That's something I can do that is a good use of my time. Bikini anyone?

I hope you are enjoying the sunshine, that it warms your heart and makes the gold underneath all that shine a bit brighter.

love,

k a t

p.s. If that slip fits me- I'll take it! Why don't you try selling it at your booth first though? I want you to have a good amount of stuff there so people get the idea of what you're about.

Opposite of King Midas

Dear Kat,

Sometimes I feel like no matter what my best intentions, my talent doesn't allow for me to realize a project after I dream it up.

Yesterday everything I worked on turned out horribly. I felt like everything I touched turned to shit or worse. I had to rip out the binding on a dress 3 times, and it still didn't look right. I finally got it to look decent, but the mods I made have altered the dress so that it no longer fits around my gigantic bottom.

If you like it, I will give this one to you after Thursday's show:







I am off to more self imposed craft exile. I hope your day goes well.

Love,
Opie

Everyone must breathe until their dying breath...

Dear Kat,

How true that song is, Regina Spektor tells me how it works: "You're young until you're not/ you love until you don't/ you try until you can't..." I feel that is entirely true some days, that life is a cycle I'm in that doesn't stop just because I feel overwhelmed.

Anyway, on to the meat and potatoes...

I am typing this from my very own computer! It's not set up the way I would need it to be yet, that will be a project for the week after next, after this show at the Wild Buffalo is over. I am stressing about about it quite a bit, actually. I feel like I took the time to start this business and now have no time to keep up with it. When I looked at starting my own business crafting, I thought "well, I can do it at my own pace and then I can have time to build up some inventory and organize before I have to concentrate on building marketing momentum." I feel like it's running away with me, though, like I have no time to market at my own choice because my connections are such that opportunites are being thrown in my path NOW and if I don't take them, I'll miss out on chances I wouldn't have had, were I anyone else. (I am also reading "The Tipping Point" and have decided that I am a Connector, which makes it easy for me to find connections I hadn't thought of, but difficult to keep momentum going for projects after the initial investment of interest. That book is really really fascinating, and I find I can't put it down when I should be doing other things...)

I have dyed a good number of slips to go along with the bags. I was so focused on that project after we did our first dyelot, and I was trying to understand WHY. I think it's because with dyeing things that are pre-made, I end up with maximum yield for minimum effort. I can see the results, a half dozen at a time. Also, I'll share a secret with you. I love sewing things, I absolutely adore the final touches that I understand (as a sewer) will make that garment a bit more wearable or that bag a bit more sturdy or what have you. I hate the beginning. I hate pinning out my pattern to fabric, hate the cutting out of each individual piece. As a crafter who mainly relies on sewing as my hobby and business, this really sucks. My mom and I used to joke that she should cut out all my projects and I would do the finishing work on all of hers. I love putting that extra line of topstich in, just for sturdiness and contrast in a different color, I love that touch of hand embroidery that finishes a project, or the buttonhole being done just so. I hate the beginning, poking my fingers with pins, using my spacial reasoning aht is nigh on non-existant, rolling over the tips of my fingernails with my rotary cutter and cursing loudly at the dogs as they jostle the table.

I went to Dakota Art to buy dye today. I taked to Meg from NW Handspun Yarns, and she told me all about dyeing fabric and how she's been doing it for quite a while. She reaffirmed that I need acid dye, and where to get it. She made sure to tell me NOT to get fiber reacitve dye, and why I shouldn't, and told me where to ask and who to talk to at Dakota. When I went into Dakota, I talked to Alex's friend Dawn, who is always wonderfully nice and very very smart. I told her what Meg had told me. We talked a bit about dyeing and what she had experience with. I picked up the three primary dye basics, got the info sheet with the instructions from her, made my purchase, and left. I came home to dye the last batch what I hoped would be a nice terracotta color.

I noticed while I was dyeing that the color was staying in the pot instead of absorbing into the clothing. It looked like this:



I got online, and sure enough, I had bought the wrong kind of dye. Shit. I went back over and looked, and though they were dyed, they were not the dark color I'd been hoping for. I'll be running them through the wash on warm a couple times to make sure all the dye is out. Quite honestly, I've had more fun with the Rit Dye than the other stuff, but maybe when I get a chance to buy the CORRECT dye, I'll have more fun. The dye comes in handy when I get a blazer that is otherwise perfect except for a faded or bleached patch, or find some fabric that is mostly slavageable and a cool print and good weight that would benefit from dyeing and look cooler as an end result.

I am going to turn most of what I have into things to sell at the Buffalo show and see if "O! Fun to shop!" and "Four Stars" might want to take whatever doesn't sell. I will check it out.

so here are the rest of the pictures:



Before: This is the small pile of slips I dyed tonight...





these are the after pics with the lime green batch, right when they are rinsed and sitting for a while in a bowl of cold water and vinegar. Do you want to hazard a guess how good my kitchen has smelled the last few days?



This is a closeup of some crochet embellishments I dyed along with the slips to stitch on later. I bought a table runner for $.49 and cut it into several pieces to use in the different dyelots. It usually dyed a much different color due to being a different fabric content, and some of them came out quite cool!



Before I had the seafom ones rinsed and hung, I was trying to dry them on the rail for our backdoor. This made it difficult to move in and out of the house through that door, which made our beautiful deck inacessible.





These are the first two of the slips drying on the deck in the sun. The weather has been so beautiful, I thought it would be a crime not to use it to my advantage.





I really like this last one because it shows exactly what I was doing while these were drying that morning: Sleeping in the sun, reading a book and lounging. My deck is perfect for that, and I love the flowers in the background. My pansies are doing so well, and look so pretty with these bright colors!

Well, it's late enough that I should really sleep. I might be able to tear John away from the Wii if I get to him before he hits the next big boss fight.

Thought about you quite a bit today while walking around in the sunshine. I missed your laugh and your easy way of speaking to everyone we come across. I talked to Carly a bit on the phone about the heat, and how if she can't handle summer here, she doesn't know what we're going to do when we get to New York! We're going to sit down when she comes to visit, and hammer out some details that hopefully will let her rest easy and just enjoy the trip. I think getting some more definitives about the trip and less of an ambiguous "Well yup, we're travellin' to NEW YORK CITY!!!" might make her feel a bit more confident about the course of our visit.

I am looking forward to swimming with you in a creek and wearing some of these beautiful creations we're making! I can't wait to show you more pics later as they become completed!

For now though, I am letting the creative side of my brain rest for the night. I have 2 bags and 4 slips to do tomorrow (my daily goal on days off) so I should crash on out. I also want to see my husband in the sunshine tomorrow, and take the dogs to Lake Padden. We'll see if we can fit it all in.

I sign off sending you love and sweet frothy frilly slippy dreams.

--Opie

don't want to work in a building downtown

Dear Opie,

I'm not sure, but I'm guessing you haven't heard the new Arcade Fire album "Neon Bible". Well there is a great song on there about not wanting to work in a building downtown. I'm not sure what I do want, but I know I don't want to do that.

Jesse just got his promotion and I'm glad for him. Even if I do have to laugh a bit and think about kids growing up in that old commercial, hoping they will someday be "middle management". He likes his job so I'm not laughing overly hard at him. It's nice to have a bit of stability and of course some health care. I benefit from those things as well.

I did apply for the school job as I think I might actually enjoy it. I really miss working with kids, I don't miss the bureaucracy. I'm not overly qualified for the position but I'd feel like a wuss if I never even applied. So that is done.

I've also been re-dying slips. They turned out sort of a deep orange and then I dyed a shirt that turned out a bit more mauve than I would have liked. Sorry about there not being pictures, my camera has been testy. I'll work on adding those later.

I've been thinking about New York a lot. I even made a google map highlighting all the places I think would be fun to go. (Ok, they are mostly yarn places, but there are also parks and museums.) This is going to be my big trip this year and yours too I know. We are going to have such a good time! I'm looking at what plays are showing, what street festivals are happening, what sorts of trouble we can get into!

hugs,

k a t

On drinking and slips...

Dear Kat,

Why O' why do I go out drinking on nights when I need to be productive the next day? I am not sick or even very hung over, but I am feeling a bit on the wobbly side and am wishing I would have come home with John when he left at around 11. I did not. It was my turn to sing next, and it was Patsy Cline, and I had my drink to finish! I got a ride with Mikey (John's best friend was visiting today) to the Beaver after that, and he thoroughly schooled me in air hockey. At the end, there were dumplings and bottles of water, but I'm wishing I had imbibed less booze and more H2O.

So, here I am, wobbly and wanting more sleep, with a pup who doesn't want me to have it, and I can't find my phone. I'm pretty sure it's in the car with John, since I didn't bring it into the bar last night. That means I'll have to take the truck and drive out to T-Mo before I hit the thrift stores, which is what I'm doing today.

I am going to find some more slips and dye them all a bit differently today, and see if I can find a good color combo to go with the gorgeous purpley/maroonish ones I dyed. I found this website and read through what I could find there about dyeing Nylon and Nylon blend fabric before I did the RIT dye, and I have to tell you, I think I will be getting some acid dye at Northwest Handspun today. I used the stovetop directions on the RIT dye though, and it said to dissolve the dye in 2 cups hot water with one cup of salt before adding it to the dyebath. I boiled some water in the kettle while I was getting my huge dyepot heated up, dissolved the dye and the salt, and added a tablespoon of laundry detergent to the large pot like the directions said. When the salt was dissolved a bit and the pot was steaming hot, I put the dye in and mixed it all around, and then added the slips. You're supposed to stir it constantly for about 30 minutes, and while I didn't do that, I did stir it pretty often.

I'm still new to all this peek-toor hosting on t3h intarwebz, so when I figure out why Flickr isn't allowing me to upload the pics I took of the slips, I will post those pics here for you to look at. I'm pretty sure the one I love that doesn't fit me will fit you, so you can give me a hint as to what you would like done to it and I will get it worked up!

Ok, I need about another hour or so of sleep before thrift store shopping, so I'm going to go crash back out. Hope Folklife is lots of fun today! I love you!

Dear Kat,

I also enjoyed our crafting this weekend! I made another dye bath with the RIT dye, mixing Dark Cocoa and Scarlet, and what came out of the poorly dyed slips that were blotchy and gross after drying were some beautiful purple slips that are ripe with opportunities to embellish and beautify! The one I liked the most (the one with all the lace in the bust) doesn't fit me in the least, but the long one and the half slip fit perfectly and are a rich mix of plum and pomegranette. The lace is a much darker purple and they look like they will be divine when they become dresses.

I really hope to see you for a time when you come up for Clara's graduation. We can even plan a crafting day!

Tonight I went with Amber and our married or psuedo married friends to sing Kareoke in Ferndale, and John was my patient and loving DD. A woman at the bar turned around to tell me how wonderful she thought my purse was, and Amber yelled out that I had made it. She asked me to come over and talk to her. Turns out, she runs a clothing store in Fairhaven called "4 Stars" and she wants me to bring in samples of my bags to see if they will sell. She is impressed and wants one for herself.

Well I am drunk and off to bed. Sleepy time and more crafting tomorrow!

I hope your night ges wellW

Dear Opie,

I so enjoyed spending my holiday weekend with you! (Some holiday, as I'm back at work on a Sunday already... but I digress.) I walked home from the greyhound a little weirded out to be back in a big city again. A place where people don't look each other in the face on the street. A place where almost nobody knows your name.

As I arrived home and drew myself a bath, I ate a cinammon Poptart for dinner and listened to my very favorite podcast. Brenda Dayne's Cast On. I reflected on how pleased I was to see you surrounded by friends in a place I used to call home. Bellingham has many temptations and actually running into people one knows and likes, without a lot of planning and coordination, is a big one for me. Seattle seems to require more forethought than that easy meandering I felt in Bellingham.

I'm also fired up by all the crafting we got into. My head is spinning with thoughts of silky dyed dresses embellished with felt flowers or pins, lace and ribbon, buttons or bows... I'm a little sad I've already comitted to going to Folklife Festival tomorrow as I don't know when I'll find time to make my crafting a reality. I wish all my crafts were as portable as knitting on the bus is.